Persevere.

As I was getting undressed to get into the shower, I took a moment to stop and look at myself in the mirror. Standing their in my undergarments, I thought of the times where I would avoid looking at myself and the feeling of disappointment and failure would flow through me.
Today I had a different feeling though.
It was like looking at an unfinished sculpture or piece of pottery. A work of art that hasn't been completely molded into a final product of extravagance. I've always been hard on myself about my weight loss, because I would see results and then life would take me for a spin, and I would gain back my accomplishments.

I'm going to Greece in less than 3 months, and I want to feel better in my skin while I'm there. Don't get me wrong, I don't have anyone to impress, but at the back of my mind I just want to feel good. You know what I mean?

I've calculated, that if I lose at least 2lbs (the "healthy" amount) per week, I can be down 26lbs by the time I go on vacation. That's just a benchmark... I won't accept less but I am expecting to lose more. I weighed myself last week, and my first weigh in is in two days.
I know that I've had many beginnings, and given myself so many "second-chances", but I guess that's just the type of person that I am. I don't want to be that "Yo-Yo diet" girl. I want to be healthy and happy.

I've also started counting my calories to stay on track. It's actually quite amusing to see if I am able to stay within my caloric intake for the day, and I have been doing really well. It makes it that much more real when the numbers are staring you right in the face.

I still haven't renewed my gym membership, but I have been doing Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred DVD, and now I'm starting to run. After a talk with Selina last night, I realized that I can do it. Me, the overweight bootyliscious girl can run. It was quite tough today, I'm not gonna lie. I found myself stopping to catch my breath quite often but I pulled through: 4.15km in 40 minutes. I know that it's not a fantastic statistic, but I'm proud of it. I know that it's going to get better as I keep training, so I'm not letting it bring me down. I plan on running the 5km in October in 30 minutes, and I am really excited about that.

All this to say that I am keeping my head high, and I'm not giving up.